Vows:

I realized today that I've been writing for this blog, and saving drafts, wimping out, writing recipes without sharing for the past year. Noone is following this blog, and yet I'm scared lest anyone drop by! I know we're all afraid to put ourselves out there, but this is the year the change happens. I've got a nasty habit of self-sabotage , and it ends here and now. Not for invisible nonexistant readers, for me. So, I'm going to turn this into a bit of a food diary: I'll post starchy meaty recipes that I make for my guy, and I'll post meat-free gluten -free experiments I make for myself--both the good ones and the gawdawfuls. Heh.

I've been experimenting with food for awhile now. I became fully vegetarian when I was 17--18, which makes this year my vegetarian "legal age"! Atww, I should treat my good habit to a whiskey; you know, for balance! I've known for awhile that bread and pasta made me feel.. well.. not good.  Girlfriend in a Carb Coma was the running joke in our house apartment. . . until the joke lost it's humor this year. I fell really ill in January, much more ill than I realized at the time--partly because it came on slowly, and partly because I got frequent migraines at that time, which gives a different perspective to pain.  Long story short, I either have a severe gluten intollerance or celiac disease. I don't know because I have no health insurance, and the local free clinic gave me a 30 day wait. At that time I was sleeping about 22 hours a day and acting like a zombie the rest of the time.. 2 months with 6 days off from migraines, joint pain that made me walk like I had osteoporosis, a spleen so swollen you could see it, and that's not even talking about my stomach issues, which all boiled down to one thing: I was suffering from malnutrition because I was unable to absorb fat.

In the past 8 months, every 2 or 3 months my body goes through another "flush", I get wild mood and temperature swings, migrains, fatigue, weakness, in/somnia issues, and when it's over, my belly's about an inch smaller yet again. The first 2 weeks left me with 5 pounds gone. Since then I've lost no weight and dropped about 4 pant sizes. Not only am I not sensitive to milk/bananas/avocados anymore, I've been craving and eating healthy fat like crazy. Obnoxious amounts of eggs.  At first I just thought I was craving the protein, but  now I realize it was the fat soluable vitamins in the yolk-- ADEK-- that my body was previously unable to absorb (let's just say the symptoms that revealed that are..ugly) & now was loudly demanding!!

I literally feel better about myself and the world all of the time, every day, even when I'm bummed out that it's difficult to eat out at restaurants, even when I can't try certain new ice creams anymore.. even when I desperately miss the smell of freshly baked crusty bread!!!   And i do, I really really do miss those little things.   So I'm going to stop worrying about what others think, and stop being lazy and write down the new and old foods I love, the recipes I've made that others love, and I'm going to live by my favorite french authoress : 


Censor the body and you censor breath and speech at the same time. Write yourself. Your body must be heard. " Helene Cixous,  Laugh of the Medusa 

oh! How delicious! In looking for that quote, I stumbled upon the more-timely-yet writer's command

"And why don't you write? Write! Writing is for you, you are for you; your body is yours, take it. I know why you haven't written. (And why I didn't write before the age of 27.) Because writing is at once too high, too great for you, it's reserved for the great - that is, for great "men"; and it's "silly". Besides, you've writtena little, but in secret. And it wasn't good, because it was secret, and because you punished yourself for writing, because you didn't go all thw way; or because you wrote, irresistibly, as when we would masturbate in secret, not to go further, but to attenuate the tension of it, just to take the edge off. And then as soon as we come, we go and make ourselves feel guilty - so as to be forgiven; to forget, to bury it until next time.

Write, let no one hold you back, let nothing stop you: not man; not the imbecilic capitalist machinery, in which the publishing houses are the crafty, obsequious relayers of imperatives handed down by an economy that works against us and off our backs; not yourself"

Yes, ma'am!  For me, for you.. I will, from this day henceforth, write myself, my body, breath, speech, myself.   

123 of Stuffed Eggses: part 1, Kali's Kurried Devils

Hi, guys! If you don't know how to boil eggs, look at the previous post. If you do, boil eggs, peel, slice in half lengthwise. Begin by popping the yolks into a bowl. If you're going to try makng all 3 recipes, keep only 1/3 of the yolks & toss the rest of the yolks (or compost, feed to your cats..). You are now ready to begin the Kali's Kurry portion of the recipe! This was the first recipe I ever created, for Easter at age 10 in the early 80's!!

You'll need a fork, a spoon, mayonaise (I prefer homemade aoli, best foods or hellman's.), mustard (your favorite is fine, yellow, brown, just not honey) curry powder, salt, pepper,and paprika.  Optional: cumin powder or seeds, cayenne pepper.

1) Leave the halved egg whites on a plate, put them in the fridge. Take a fork and gently crumble the yolks. Don't worry about going too crazy, this should be simple and quick. you're going to smooth them out completely once the mayo's added.

2) Add 1 tablespoon of  mustard to your bowl, 1 pinch of cumin if you have some laying around, 1/2 teaspoon of premade curry powder, 2 shakes of pepper and 1 shake of salt followed by 2 tablespoons of mayonaise of your choice . Stir with a fork, eliminating all lumps and bumps.

3) At this point, if it seems dry/very thick (which will depend on how many yolks you've used), add a spoonful of mayonnaise and a tiny bit more mustard. It should be thick enough to keep most of a spoonful lingering when you overturn said spoon. Now taste it--does it need more salt/pepper/curry? Adjust to your 'buds and your buds' 'buds. 

4)  Now you have two options: scoop or pipe.  Grab those eggwhites out of the fridge.Again, if you're trying all 3 recipes at once, only fill 1/3 of the eggs with yolks.
     Scoop: Most of the time, I just scoop a spoonful of yellow and plop it in the little eggwhite bowls.  If it seems messy, use two spoons--one to clean the yolk off another. 
     Pipe: You can be schmancy and buy a piping bag (which seems silly, unless you make loads of cupcakes..) or be simple and diy a piping bag by putting the yolk mixture into a ziplock bag and snipping a TINY corner ( here's a decent video until I put one up of my own ), squishing the yolk out of said corner.

5) Top with paprika for some color/flavor bling. If you're feeling adventurous, cumin seeds and cayenne pepper are fun toppings as wellhttp://www.blogger.com/post-edit.g?blogID=2436857860019059545&postID=8438442526230389477!

FOODNERD ALERT: the history of the deviled egg (according to the food timeline ) involves the spices in the stuffing rather than the stuffing of the egg: "Devil--a culinary term which...first appeared as a noun in the 18th century, and then in the early 19th century as a verb meaning to cook something with fiery hot spices or condiments...The term was presumably adopted because of the connection between the devil and the excessive heat in Hell..."---The Oxford Companion to Food, Alan Davidson [Oxford University Press:Oxford] 1999 (pages 247-248).

Hard-Boiling Eggs for Stuffing

These are simple instructions on how to hard boil an egg for stuffing such as deviled eggs or eggs mimosa. These aren't the worlds' best softboiled/hardboiled breakfast eggs, they're simple hardboiled eggs for the stuffed egg novice. For breakfast eggs, see EndOpost.

Before we start, Two important tips:
1) COLD WATER: essential to hardboiling eggs my mama's way.
2) Your eggs double! Bear with me, I realize it may seem obvious, but: Think about 1 egg per person +1 egg (to balance for mistakes).
Count-n-boil accordingly, madame or sir.

* Ok, grab your UNSHELLED eggs from the fridge, and gently place them in a pot. Unless you only own one pot, try to choose a pot large enough that you don't have to layer the eggs. Of course this will differ depending on how many you're cooking. Why does it matter? Layered eggs boil unevenly. Grody. Newer eggs are harder to peel, according to the Joy of Cooking, so go ahead, use the ones that've been in your fridge for a week!

* I was taught the water and the eggs need to warm up together. So......
Bring your pot o eggs to the faucet and cover the eggs with COLD water. They don't need to be drowning, but you don't want to see any shells peeking above the surface of the water. If you need precise measurements for the water, somewhere between "covered" and an inch above that will do. Add a pinch of salt[I don't add baking soda, see below for why.. and why others do]

*Place them on the stove on high. Depending on water salinity, humidity, etc., it usually takes 2-5 minutes for water to boil. Once the water begins boiling, set a timer. If you have medium/large eggs, set it for 10 minutes. For supersized eggs, set it for 12. If you don't have a timer, use the microwave, your phone alarm, etc. Watching the clock has never worked well for me..just for the record! It's fine to go over that time a little, just remember, the longer they boil, the RUBBERIER the whites get. A little is ok, a lot is..well..
Of course, this is what happens when I don't set the alarm..why yes, I DID burn the water AND the eggs while surfing the internet!

*While the eggs are boiling, prepare an ice bath: Fill a big bowl (preferably not plastic) halfway with ice cubes and water--I usually put a tray of ice cubes in and then add water on top. In the Netherlands we called this "scaring" the eggs--I don't know about you, but I find ice baths terrifying! If you don't have an extra bowl/ice cubes, no worries, just relax and wait for the timer, I've got you covered in the next step!

* Take your pot with eggs/water over to the sink (Careful! It's HOT, yo!) Run cold water over the pot until the water isn't hot, pour most of the water off & then add the eggs to the ice bath. This uses the same principle as running hot water on a jar to get the lid off: the egg and the shell expand at different rates, as does the air between..giving yourself that easy-to peel feeling..and high 5 to THAT! It also eliminates the greenish ring around the yolk. The green color results from a chemical reaction: the egg yolk's iron with sulfur in the egg white.
That's science! If you don't have ice cubes/bowl/etc, just let the cold water run over the pot with eggs until the eggs are cool to the touch. It's water-wasting, yes, but really helps peel the eggs..choose your battles, son.

At this point, you can store them in the fridge for a couple of days. Or, you can peel them!

* To peel, I do a very unsophisticated light crack on the counter all around the egg, followed by a light squish/peel action. Slip the shell off into the garbage can (if you're doing a bunch, it might be smart to drag that can over to you). I find that after the initial hole is made in the shell, it's often a bit easier to get the rest off when the eggs are underwater.. something to do with getting that creepy 'skin' off...if the eggs aren't completely cool, set them in the fridge at this point, they'll slice more evenly when the yolk is a bit more set.

*Ok, you've got all of your eggs peeled and on a plate/bowl near you. One more step and you're on to the stuffing part! Grab a butter knife, and cut those suckers in half, lengthwise (not standing up). This is primarily so that when filled they won't topple over! Take a butter knife, no need for something sharp, and cut them in half. [Dip the knife in water between eggs. ].
Taking half an egg at a time, squeeze each side to pop the yolk into a bowl. They might need a little nudge from a spoon or your thumb.. If you're stuffing your eggs with something other than the yolks, discard the yolks at this time. If the white cracks, tears, is ugly, [or or or..] no worries, mate! Eat it! You'll probably have at least one mishap, and that's ok!

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Although I've been doing this for years (for real, it was my first 'specialty' at age 12!), I'm a nerd & researched this post thoroughly for hows, whys, and alternatives. As a food anarchist, I love alternatives, so here are some alternate arguments and nerdy citing of sources!

Some people like to let them reach boiling point then let the eggs cool slowly like this deviled egg oriented site and here, at the incredible edible egg! Others like to pierce one end with a tack or needle or extol the virtues of blowing the shell off.. These just strike me as bacteria waiting to happen, but there are many places that encourage it. Find your bliss..

Also, some people add vinegar, claiming it makes the shells softer or add baking soda to the water before boiling. Here's a scientific reason why that's fun but not useful. In the end, it seems like the only REAL solution to ease of peeling is either aged eggs (in the fridge a week or near sell by date) or letting them sit out overnight, which makes sense, liquid reduction and all that jazz.
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So, you've got your eggs boiled, at least one per person, plus 2, yes? And sliced them all in half? Yay!! Let's stuff!

Of course, you can fill your eggs with anything you desire, but keep in mind 2 things: viscosity (pico de gallo? Well..too much liquid results in stained clothing) and texture (yes, hummos is healthy and will STAY in an egg, but it feels a bit crumbly-creepy on the tongue, no?).  Here are 3 options to start you off and inspire lovely future finger food:

Kali's Curry, similar to a traditional devilled egg, but with a kukurried kick
Sea Spawn, with a bit of spiced smoked salmon, lemon, and capers
Chupacabra, with a thick chunky guacamole--scary looking but really healthy!

For me, the best finger foods taste AND look delicious; next to eachother on a platter, there's a lovely balance between these 3 . . with color, texture, AND a bit of healthiness to boot!

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PS:For a nerdtastic description on how to make perfect boiled breakfast eggs, the most beautiful, well thought out AND well researched description is here, by Food Lab with the most amazing eggspiriments ever, & (their fb page) , with lovely photos of ridiculous accuracy showing perfect eggs from runnysoft to crazyhard..enjoy!